High stakes

One little thing I forgot to mention in yesterday’s post is that Austin has an abdominal ultrasound tomorrow morning. This is the first time we’ve actually looked at his kidney since December 7, when we confirmed that the tumor was, well, indeed a tumor and, in fact, a growing tumor.

There’s no specific reason that we’re doing this tomorrow except that it’s time. His belly has healed from his surgery and two months have passed and radiation and chemo should be working their magic and it’s just time to see what’s going on. Of course, the hope is that there’s nothing going on. Nothing new, nothing unusual, nothing suspicious or shadowy or blob-like.

If there is, if there is something that is definitely there that wasn’t there before or something that has definitely changed in size or shape or maybe even color from the way it was before, well, then it would finally be time to say goodbye to that kidney. To cut our losses and take the damn thing out. We will fight, as we’ve always fought, to keep that hard-working little organ as long as we possibly can. But not if it puts our hard-working little boy at too much risk. No, no, one is worth way more than the other.

So, we are hopeful as always but we are also aware (as always) of how high these stakes are set. Very very high. As always.