I’m a cocky mother fucker. With my champagne chilled and ready to uncork. With my celebratory blogpost, not typed yet, but certainly drafted in my head. With every second of my month tied up with things completely unrelated to cancer.

A cocky mother fucker.

Let me start by saying that ultrasound imaging sucks. It’s simply no good. Blurry and blotchy and confusing to read. Yet that’s what we’ve been relying on for the past two years because it has no risks associated with it: no radiation exposure, no further damage to the already damaged kidney. So, today, on the ultrasound, it appears that something’s there. Something that wasn’t there before.

We’re not sure — of course. We’ll need to schedule additional testing. First a GFR, to see where his kidney function is so we can determine which test to do next. Assuming his GFR is above 30 (and his nephrologist estimates it’s at least 60), then he’s “well” enough to be able to have an MRI or CT with contrast (oh, the irony). Either of those ought to let us know if this thing is nothing or if it’s something.

But let’s be real here. It’s always something. Every fucking time this happens, we invent a thousand scenarios to explain why it might be nothing. We imagine every possible rare or random “nothing” it might be. But it’s never nothing. Every fucking time, it’s always something and the something it turns out to be every fucking time is CANCER.

It’s always something.

0 replies
  1. donna winkelman
    donna winkelman says:

    Oh Krissy, I’m just so so sorry about what you, Mark, Austin, and of course, Braedan are going through. I wish we could be closer to provide more hands-on support. You will not leave our thoughts. We are hoping for a different turn of events – SOON. We send many hugs and much love.

    Reply
  2. Cynthia Murray
    Cynthia Murray says:

    Drink that champagne–or something stronger. There are no adequate words, but you will get through this because … just because that’s what the Gallaghers have done so well.

    Reply
  3. glloplloyd
    glloplloyd says:

    Krissy and Mark, Whitney and I just returned and I immediately turned on my computer to get your news. We were thinking of all of you this morning, while picking strawberries in Virginia. We have brought you some fresh organic strawberries all the way from the foothills of the Shenandoah. HOpe that at least they are allowed. We send you all our love and offers of any help, Georgia

    Reply
  4. Chris Holley-Starling
    Chris Holley-Starling says:

    Suck, suck, suck, suck, suck, suck, suck, suck! Oh shit! FUCK! This is so NOT FAIR! I a so sorry you have to go through this, this whatever it is.
    Here’s hoping that maybe, just this once, this something really is nothing.
    You are in my thoughts.

    Reply
  5. Karen
    Karen says:

    Dear Gallagher Family- The Ruppe’s are sending you all hugs, love, and prayers. Tommy is wearing his Baldrick’s t-shirt today. LOVE YOU!

    Reply

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