What to Wish For
Mark and I sat around for a long time last night trying to figure out exactly what to hope will come out of today. Wishing for everything to “be okay” doesn’t quite cut it, nor does my usual “I hope the worst is behind us.” We need some specifics here.
We’ve settled on four scenarios, two likely and two highly unlikely. Of course, there may be one or ten other possibilities that haven’t yet crossed our minds, but we do have a well of experience for how these things work.
The two most realistic possibilities are that we clearly see the lesion and 1) are able to easily reach it with a needle biopsy or 2) aren’t able to reach it. The first is obviously the most desirable. Then we could schedule a biopsy and get real information. At that point, we would know exactly what to wish for: that the “thing” is not cancer. And not only not cancer, but defined with certainty as something else so we don’t even have to worry about it. Then we’d finally pop open that champagne. If we’re unable to reach it with a needle biopsy, I think the next step would be to watch and wait, with repeat scans. I don’t think any of us (parents or doctors) believe that the need to know outweighs the risk of surgery. If it grows or changes on repeat scans (probably monthly), then we could justify going in surgically since growth almost always equals cancer.
The two unlikely scenarios fall on opposite ends of the good-bad spectrum. One is that the “thing” has disappeared. I know that sounds like the best option, but it would also raise many questions, like what was it saw last week and where the hell did it go? I imagine we would also end up with more frequent repeat scans if that was the case, to make sure it doesn’t magically reappear. The worst possibility would be that it’s grown considerably since last week, forcing us to act quickly since, you know, growth equals cancer.
So, for all of you who’ve sent me lovely messages saying you’re wishing, hoping and praying for us today, now you have a specific request to send out into the universe: That we can easily reach it with a needle biopsy and that’s it’s ultimately defined as something other than cancer.
Okay… got it? Now get busy.
Wishing, hoping and praying, all at once!
Jodi
Good job on the clear thinking, Krissy and Mark. Georgia
I’m praying for you and your family.
Praying for you guys. Austin is an inspiration. You are an inspiration. May God’s grace continue to carry your family through this. -Mike MacGregor
Krissy, we are sending lots of prayers to all of you today. I am hoping that it is alright that I added Austin(just his first name) to the St, Paul’s prayer list. It is a list that has brought me comfort over the years as I have had family members in need of prayer. The idea that an entire community is praying for healing just seems pretty amazing. And, since Austin is part of the St Paul’s greater community, it just seemed right. If you are uncomfortable with that, just let me know. In the meantime, I will plan on headind down to the chapel for a quick prayer later this afternoon.
Thinking of you always but esp today! Hugs….